Hilary Jacobs Hendel | The Change Triangle

Consider these scripts designed to soften defenses so you can relate more authentically with emotions in mind.

Shame is an excruciating emotion that makes it hard (or impossible) to be seen as hurtful, fallible, or wrong.

Being connected feels good and right. But have you ever asked yourself, "What does connection feels like?"

Perfectionism gives us the illusion of control in the midst of emotions that feel out of control, especially when we’re young.

Ever walk into a room and feel all eyes are looking at you? You imagine people are judging your every flaw. You start to shrink and think...

For many of us, our early experiences with emotions involved us being told to "get over it" in one way or another.

My teenagers' dark and surly moods, my husband's anxiety, my mother's rare show of displeasure, and my father's anger and frugality, all...

Changing careers was scary, but hating my job was worse.

"He's an idiot," my father would snap when someone didn't do something the way he wanted. It didn't bother me then. But now I realize my...

Dating tips for finding emotional intimacy and connection

For most of us the “guilt versus resentment choice” will rear its difficult head. When those times arise, here are some tips that might.

Assigning fault and blame might feel good in a the moment, but it doesn’t help you or your relationship in the long run. Try this instead.

Why do some children become sad, withdrawn, insecure, or angry, whereas others become happy, curious, affectionate, and self-confident?

Every year I was so excited for my birthday. And then came the crash.

Thinking before we speak is a skill that requires practice over a lifetime. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about caring enough to try.

How would a little boy learn that it was good to express intimacy and affection if his own father could not? Answer: A little boy would not.

“The problem with verbal abuse is there is no evidence,” Marta shared. She came for help with a long-standing depression.

I suspected Robert’s sudden question about normalcy had to do with his new relationship. Love renders us vulnerable to rejection. We natural

Many of us as children or adolescents shared our feelings with the “wrong” person - someone whose response was to humiliate or reject us.