wellbeing

Welcome to Hilary's Blog

It's Not Always Depression

From Random House, on sale now. Order here!

The book, e-book and audio book are here:

3 Reasons to Hold Hope for Healing Emotional Pain

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Apr 8
4 min

3 Reasons to Hold Hope for Healing Emotional Pain

It's hard to hold hope that healing and transformation are possible especially if nothing has helped so far. Here's why I hold hope.

The Important Difference Between Anxiety and Fear

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Mar 9
5 min

The Important Difference Between Anxiety and Fear

Anxiety and fear are words often used interchangeably. But they are not the same! Distinguishing between anxiety and fear is crucial.

4 Ways to Increase Joy: Putting the Science of Joy into Everyday Practice

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Jan 8
5 min

4 Ways to Increase Joy: Putting the Science of Joy into Everyday Practice

Joy is one of the seven core emotions on the Change Triangle. Joy, like all core emotions, has a particular feeling in the body, although...

Surviving Loneliness: Living in the Grey

Hilary Jacobs Hendel and Jean Lannin

Dec 10, 2020
6 min

Surviving Loneliness: Living in the Grey

Reflections and resources to undo aloneness.

How to Release Sadness: Lessons from Experiential Psychotherapy

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Nov 12, 2020
5 min

How to Release Sadness: Lessons from Experiential Psychotherapy

Did you ever have the feeling that you were sad and needed a good cry, but you couldn’t get the tears out? I certainly have.

When Buried Anger Leads to Depression & How To Heal

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Oct 8, 2020
6 min

When Buried Anger Leads to Depression & How To Heal

When someone is depressed, it's worth asking what other emotions they might have buried deep inside that need to be dealt with.

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Sep 10, 2020
5 min

The Key to Inner Balance

For inner equilibrium and harmony, we have to balance our use and expenditure of energy.

A New Way to Understand & Treat Depression: Part 2 The Story of Phil and His Grief

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Aug 11, 2020
3 min

A New Way to Understand & Treat Depression: Part 2 The Story of Phil and His Grief

When someone we love dies, sadness is the healthy biological response to our loss. We cannot just ‘get over it’ or ‘suck it up’.

4 Simple Phrases to Halt Anxious Thoughts

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Jun 11, 2020
4 min

4 Simple Phrases to Halt Anxious Thoughts

Speaking supportive words to ourselves will provide relief, much like a parent reassures a distressed child. Want to experiment? Try this!

Rupture & Repair Part 2: Connection, Disconnection, & Emotional Communication in Adults

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

May 6, 2020
8 min

Rupture & Repair Part 2: Connection, Disconnection, & Emotional Communication in Adults

Assigning fault and blame might feel good in a the moment, but it doesn’t help you or your relationship in the long run. Try this instead.

10 Tips to Prevent Fights with Loved Ones During Quarantine (and Beyond)

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Apr 5, 2020
5 min

10 Tips to Prevent Fights with Loved Ones During Quarantine (and Beyond)

More than ever people need tools to handle their emotions. We must work hard to NOT take out stress on our loved ones.

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Feb 1, 2020
6 min

Healing Chronic Boredom

Rachel grew up in a chaotic household. When I met her as a young adult, she didn’t seem to care much about anything.

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Jan 1, 2020
7 min

6 Tips to Improve your Emotional Health

Emotion education has the power to transform anxiety and depression, bolster your confidence, and help you feel your best self.

5 Tips to Build Emotional Resilience When the Holidays Bring Distress

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Dec 6, 2019
4 min

5 Tips to Build Emotional Resilience When the Holidays Bring Distress

It's not unusual for the holidays to bring up anxiety. But, a little emotion education and a few tips go a long way to getting through.

7 Ways to Help a Child Deal with Traumatic Stress

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Oct 14, 2019
5 min

7 Ways to Help a Child Deal with Traumatic Stress

Traumatic stress feels awful. The body tenses and succumbs to many other physiological changes leading to digestive problems and headaches,

What is the Difference Between Conventional Talk Psychotherapy and Experiential Psychotherapy?

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Apr 15, 2019
5 min

What is the Difference Between Conventional Talk Psychotherapy and Experiential Psychotherapy?

I learned of an entirely new way of working where the focus was not only on helping a person gain insight but on fostering healing.

5 Ways To Work The Change Triangle as a Beginner

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Feb 15, 2019
4 min

5 Ways To Work The Change Triangle as a Beginner

Emotions are powerful forces that affect the mind, brain, and especially the body. They have power to cause great distress.

Getting to Know Your Three Brains: Part 5 Challenges to Becoming Aware

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Aug 14, 2018
3 min

Getting to Know Your Three Brains: Part 5 Challenges to Becoming Aware

Many of us are afraid, uncomfortable, or reluctant to know our internal world. Here are some of the reasons:

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

Sep 14, 2017
4 min

The Problem With Yelling

“The problem with verbal abuse is there is no evidence,” Marta shared. She came for help with a long-standing depression.

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

May 16, 2017
3 min

Am I Normal?

I suspected Robert’s sudden question about normalcy had to do with his new relationship. Love renders us vulnerable to rejection. We natural

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