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Hilary Jacobs Hendel | The Change Triangle
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Heather Sanford, LCSW
May 2, 20242 min read
Emotions Education: A Missing Piece
Anxiety is a signal that we must tend to underlying core emotions. This video explains how. The Change Triangle is the guide.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Oct 7, 20236 min read
Defining & Finding Your Authentic Self
Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. - Aristotle Lillian, a patient of mine, didn’t know who she truly was. She lacked a...

Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jul 12, 20232 min read
Why You Just Can't “Get Over It”
For many of us, our early experiences with emotions involved us being told to "get over it" in one way or another.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Mar 12, 20234 min read
3 Reasons Why It’s Scary to Feel Good About Yourself
In the kind of psychotherapy I practice called AEDP, we often focus on feel-good emotions like joy and pride. Deepening the experience of...


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Feb 8, 20234 min read
Detaching with Love and Openheartedness
My teenagers' dark and surly moods, my husband's anxiety, my mother's rare show of displeasure, and my father's anger and frugality, all...

Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Nov 8, 20223 min read
3 Tips to Stay More Present in the Present
Resisting the mind’s pull toward future worries or past wounds takes practice.

Hilary Jacobs Hendel and Juli Fraga, PsyD
Sep 7, 20227 min read
Healing From Trauma Means Dealing With Disgust
This article was originally published on Slate.com on 6/20/22. Irene recently came to therapy because her anxiety had been revving up,...


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Feb 7, 20223 min read
Four Ways to Engage with the Change Triangle Tool for Emotional Health
Most people have never had any emotions education at all. In 2022, this is an astounding fact. As a result of the lack of education in...


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jan 10, 20224 min read
22 Crucial Things to Know About Emotions for Emotional Health
Our dysfunctional society fails to educate us on emotions. Here are a few basics to start you on your way to more knowledge.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
May 7, 20215 min read
From Confusion to Clarity
(The personal reflections on confusion quoted throughout this article were generously shared by "Michele." Thank you, Michele.) "I often...


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Apr 8, 20214 min read
3 Reasons to Hold Hope for Healing Emotional Pain
It's hard to hold hope that healing and transformation are possible especially if nothing has helped so far. Here's why I hold hope.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Mar 9, 20215 min read
The Important Difference Between Anxiety and Fear
Anxiety and fear are words often used interchangeably. But they are not the same! Distinguishing between anxiety and fear is crucial.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Oct 8, 20206 min read
When Buried Anger Leads to Depression & How To Heal
When someone is depressed, it's worth asking what other emotions they might have buried deep inside that need to be dealt with.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Aug 11, 20203 min read
A New Way to Understand & Treat Depression: Part 2 The Story of Phil and His Grief
When someone we love dies, sadness is the healthy biological response to our loss. We cannot just ‘get over it’ or ‘suck it up’.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jul 11, 20205 min read
A New Way To Understand and Treat Depression and Suicidal Thoughts: Part 1 - The Story of Alex
Think depression is only about a flaw in chemistry? Think again.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jun 11, 20204 min read
4 Simple Phrases to Halt Anxious Thoughts
Speaking supportive words to ourselves will provide relief, much like a parent reassures a distressed child. Want to experiment? Try this!


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
May 6, 20208 min read
Rupture & Repair Part 2: Connection, Disconnection, & Emotional Communication in Adults
Assigning fault and blame might feel good in a the moment, but it doesn’t help you or your relationship in the long run. Try this instead.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Mar 9, 20206 min read
Rupture & Repair Part 1:Connection, Disconnection, & Emotional Communication in Infancy
Why do some children become sad, withdrawn, insecure, or angry, whereas others become happy, curious, affectionate, and self-confident?


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Feb 1, 20206 min read
Healing Chronic Boredom
Rachel grew up in a chaotic household. When I met her as a young adult, she didn’t seem to care much about anything.


Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Jan 1, 20207 min read
6 Tips to Improve your Emotional Health
Emotion education has the power to transform anxiety and depression, bolster your confidence, and help you feel your best self.
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