Loosening the Grip of Perfectionism (Part 1)
Perfectionism gives us the illusion of control in the midst of emotions that feel out of control, especially when we’re young.
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Hilary Jacobs Hendel | The Change Triangle
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Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Oct 7
- 6 min
Defining & Finding Your Authentic Self
Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. - Aristotle Lillian, a patient of mine, didn’t know who she truly was. She lacked a...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Jul 12
- 2 min
Why You Just Can't “Get Over It”
For many of us, our early experiences with emotions involved us being told to "get over it" in one way or another.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Feb 8
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Detaching with Love and Openheartedness
My teenagers' dark and surly moods, my husband's anxiety, my mother's rare show of displeasure, and my father's anger and frugality, all...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Nov 8, 2022
- 3 min
3 Tips to Stay More Present in the Present
Resisting the mind’s pull toward future worries or past wounds takes practice.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- May 9, 2022
- 4 min
“He’s an Idiot!” Considering the Judgments We All Make
"He's an idiot," my father would snap when someone didn't do something the way he wanted. It didn't bother me then. But now I realize my...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Nov 7, 2021
- 3 min
Two Powerful Techniques to Lower Anxiety
Two effective techniques to decrease anxiety based on accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP) and the Change Triangle® tool.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Oct 10, 2021
- 7 min
5 Crucial Qualities to Seek in a Life Partner
Dating tips for finding emotional intimacy and connection
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- May 7, 2021
- 5 min
From Confusion to Clarity
(The personal reflections on confusion quoted throughout this article were generously shared by "Michele." Thank you, Michele.) "I often...
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Sep 10, 2020
- 5 min
The Key to Inner Balance
For inner equilibrium and harmony, we have to balance our use and expenditure of energy.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Mar 9, 2020
- 6 min
Rupture & Repair Part 1:Connection, Disconnection, & Emotional Communication in Infancy
Why do some children become sad, withdrawn, insecure, or angry, whereas others become happy, curious, affectionate, and self-confident?
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Dec 6, 2019
- 4 min
5 Tips to Build Emotional Resilience When the Holidays Bring Distress
It's not unusual for the holidays to bring up anxiety. But, a little emotion education and a few tips go a long way to getting through.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Aug 14, 2018
- 3 min
Getting to Know Your Three Brains: Part 5 Challenges to Becoming Aware
Many of us are afraid, uncomfortable, or reluctant to know our internal world. Here are some of the reasons:
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Apr 13, 2017
- 5 min
What's in a Moment?
But we can shift our mind to be in the present moment. And when we do, we wake up a visceral part of us. I am alive. I am here.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Nov 16, 2016
- 3 min
Why Am I Uncomfortable Getting Close To People?
Many of us as children or adolescents shared our feelings with the “wrong” person - someone whose response was to humiliate or reject us.
Hilary Jacobs Hendel
- Oct 10, 2015
- 2 min
The Best Way to Discover Something New About You!
Slowing down will allow you to notice more about your emotional world. Want to experiment?
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