shame

Welcome to Hilary's Blog

It's Not Always Depression

Aug 63 min read

“It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem. It’s me.” The Agony and the Ecstasy of Accountability

Shame is an excruciating emotion that makes it hard (or impossible) to be seen as hurtful, fallible, or wrong.

Aug 7, 20225 min read

My Crooked Path to Becoming a Psychotherapist & Striving to Be My Authentic Self

Changing careers was scary, but hating my job was worse.

Mar 7, 20224 min read

The Emotional Toll of Traumatic Brain Injury

The emotional challenges following a traumatic brain injury are many.

Jul 5, 20214 min read

5 Important Things to Know About Toxic Shame

Hilary Jacobs Hendel explains the difference between healthy and toxic shame. The Change Triangle tool guides healing.

Nov 14, 20195 min read

Disgust: A Natural Emotional Response to Abuse

Disgust is an emotion that is rarely talked about but is very important for healing from verbal, physical, and sexual abuse.

May 16, 20173 min read

Am I Normal?

I suspected Robert’s sudden question about normalcy had to do with his new relationship. Love renders us vulnerable to rejection. We natural

Apr 19, 20164 min read

What 'Mad Men' and Don Draper Taught Us About Trauma and Shame

Don cannot bear being alone without being drunk. Without alcohol, the emotions and longings from the past get too close to the surface.

Jan 10, 20162 min read

Why We Hide

"We hide by avoiding things that will change us...We hide by asking for reassurance. We hide by letting someone else speak up and lead."

Jun 30, 20155 min read

It's Not Always Depression, Sometimes It's Shame

How can it be that a seemingly depressed person, one who shows clinical symptoms, doesn’t respond to antidepressants or psychotherapy?