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Welcome to Hilary's Blog

It's Not Always Depression

Dec 17, 20184 min

Handling the Holidays When Your Parents Stress You Out

We don’t get to pick our families. And, sometimes the family we have is just not what we want.

Nov 15, 20173 min

Fathers, Sons, & Intimacy

How would a little boy learn that it was good to express intimacy and affection if his own father could not? Answer: A little boy would not.

Sep 14, 20174 min

The Problem With Yelling

“The problem with verbal abuse is there is no evidence,” Marta shared. She came for help with a long-standing depression.

Jul 13, 20175 min

The Feeling of Not Enough

By educating himself on emotions and how the brain is affected by childhood adversity, Mike learned that everyone struggled.

May 16, 20173 min

Am I Normal?

I suspected Robert’s sudden question about normalcy had to do with his new relationship. Love renders us vulnerable to rejection. We natural

Nov 16, 20163 min

Why Am I Uncomfortable Getting Close To People?

Many of us as children or adolescents shared our feelings with the “wrong” person - someone whose response was to humiliate or reject us.

Jan 10, 20162 min

Why We Hide

"We hide by avoiding things that will change us...We hide by asking for reassurance. We hide by letting someone else speak up and lead."

Dec 16, 20153 min

Want to Feel More Authentic? Get to Know Your Defenses!

All of us use defenses to avoid emotions. In fact, defenses are developed for precisely that reason—to avoid painful feelings.

Oct 27, 20153 min

The Unattainable Standard for Men

Men don't typically feel free to be emotionally honest and authentically vulnerable for many good reasons.