Hilary Jacobs Hendel | The Change Triangle

We don’t get to pick our families. And, sometimes the family we have is just not what we want.

I suspected Robert’s sudden question about normalcy had to do with his new relationship. Love renders us vulnerable to rejection. We natural

Cecily grew up in a family with lots of shouting and sometimes some hitting. Cecily naturally thought yelling and hitting WAS anger. I

Apologizing is hard. If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of an insincere apology, you know how demoralizing that feels. In stark contrast, a good apology is elixir for relationship wounds. Mara and Jack had been living together for a year. While dusting, Mara accidentally knocked over a glass figurine and it shattered against the tile floor. Unfortunately, it was the cherished award Jack received for his fine work in advertising. Mara’s first impulse was to hide the evid

Many of us as children or adolescents shared our feelings with the “wrong” person - someone whose response was to humiliate or reject us.

When I was a little girl, I felt at times alone and not a priority. That feeling of aloneness and not mattering made me very sad.

We blame ourselves. We beat ourselves up. We call ourselves names like “loser” and “failure.” And then we wonder why we feel small, alone