Hilary Jacobs Hendel | The Change Triangle

My teenagers' dark and surly moods, my husband's anxiety, my mother's rare show of displeasure, and my father's anger and frugality, all...

Rachel grew up in a chaotic household. When I met her as a young adult, she didn’t seem to care much about anything.

Most people are uncomfortable with emotions. And that makes sense to me. So many of us have been raised in an emotion-phobic culture.

Many of us as children or adolescents shared our feelings with the “wrong” person - someone whose response was to humiliate or reject us.

"We hide by avoiding things that will change us...We hide by asking for reassurance. We hide by letting someone else speak up and lead."

All of us use defenses to avoid emotions. In fact, defenses are developed for precisely that reason—to avoid painful feelings.

Men don't typically feel free to be emotionally honest and authentically vulnerable for many good reasons.